“Don’t confuse me with the truth! ” “I need to find this from my truth of the matter only! ” Sound knowledgeable?
Have you noticed how reasons escalate with emotional abusers? They tell you that an item is bothering them with no uncertain terms, although often fail to fill you in on what any hell it is. So in this case you are knowing fully what precisely they feel, yet most people remain in the dark as to the reasons.
You really feel unheard in that moment books, indeed, are… You are not granted permission to share. You are not to have an opinion that differs from theirs. You see, if you hold on to your point of view, there is a price tag in this interaction with an emotional abuser.
To get this message by way of you, the emotional abuser will pile on another part of attack aimed to stop you in your tracks. It might just sound like this… “Well, would you logical position, BUT…
You’re certain a “but” is returning and with it is the up coming emotional assault.
It may start with, “That’s the problem with you… You will be too intense, too convincing, too late with this explanation, too whatever to help you compel me to take you will in and actually hear which are something to say… worthy of a attention, much less my attention. ” Get the picture?
If this is the pattern from interaction with your intimate partner, take a hard and fast look at the mother nature of abusive relationships. The better you grasp these kind of dynamics, the easier it will be for you to break the cycle in abuse before it spirals out of control.
An important part of how they deal with their personal vulnerability is to make you erroneous in order for them to be right. As you know, from where that they stand, they must be best. So, don’t confuse them with the facts.
Most of the mess around “don’t confuse myself with the facts” is simply an effort to re-establish a great unequal distribution of electric power in the relationship. The emotional assault or blow on your character is their attempt to tilt the scale, because in that moment they are tasting their own vulnerability.
The price you will pay is verbal emotional abuse. You know the topic is over, so you pull the idea back and lick the wounds inspired by the sentimental abuse dished out to keep you in your place. If you’re following me in this detailed description of this interaction, then you likely have experienced verbal emotional exploitation. It is both subtle and significant. It leaves most people emotionally off base, usually even before you know what happened.
Then, if you get lucky, they may expand on their concern with you feel this sigh of relief, because today you have something you can cope with or at least address. Therefore you seek to share your perspective, your point of view. And wham, you’re cut off with, Don’t confuse me together with the facts. My mind consists.
What emotional abusers are really telling you is that there is no room to your reality in a discussion with them. Embracing your mindset is beyond them. The simple truth is, your perspective doesn’t justify their consideration, because they formerly made up their mind and they really don’t want you to confuse them with your facts.